doing my part to get us to page 5 by opening discussion on what the hell is going on here

https://www.tiktok.com/@cpsjf

i'll start

what are these bikes for?

where do the sparks come from?

why do they keep going backwards?

whats with the theme of "nations?"

and of course

hitler?

Got dat 2nd dose Sunday. Intend to attend. Haven't pedaled a bike since 2020; might need to source some 650b wheels. Will prob drive to the ferry at least; might need to source some 265/75R16 wheels. Will prob source neither and just yolo it. Will prob flake anyway, kind've a wreck right now. Woooooooooo

thinkin i might bring some friends

Fix your bikes before the ride starts.

"Vaxed, waxed & ready to party."

started in on this a couple of days ago.

having been sitting in the garage and not been ridden in over 12 months, the camping bike needs a bunch of things done to it.

tires:
had gone flat. probably a bunch of dried sealant inside. pulled the tubeless valve cores out, poured a 2 oz. bottle of Stans in each, then re-seated the beads with a floor pump and let them weep a bit of sealant while sitting overnight. good to roll.

brakes:
hydraulic pistons had seized closed. pulled the wheels back off the bike, pulled the pads out and backed the pistons out with a flathead screwdriver. re-installed the wheels and pumped the brakes to re-center the pistons. good to stop.

handlebars:
never cared much for the stock handlebars, swapped them out for a set of Shimano PRO PLT bars from my parts bin. unwrapped all the dirty bar tape that was still on them from SSCXWCPDX '16. ordered new bar wrap. will finish reinstalling the levers after the tape arrives. will need to reinstall the handlebar bag mount as well.

still to do:
- clean and relube drivetrain. wiped some surface rust off the chain and sprayed it with a bit of silicon spray to loosen it up. a deep-clean will follow later. may pull the crank off and clean up the old grease on the spindle.
- fix front derailleur. cable is stretched and indexing needs adjustment.
- pull camping gear (sleeping pad, water filter, etc.) out from closet and make sure it's clean and aired out.

wait, you haven't ridden a bike in over 12 months!?
Jesus. I'd walk into the sea.

Easy on the pandemic shaming Ben fuck.

Besides, Jesus walks on the water.

Dear Ben,

will this ride feature powerpoints about how to bikepack? if not, I would humbly request a refund.

Yeah, sorry guys, no offense intended. I am just done with this thing.

observations about steely dan

build an ebike, bro

yeah who needs a battery just do a shitload of coke

Named for a particular model of dildo in the Burroughs novel Naked Lunch.

that back half elevation looks pretty rough for my raspberry jam legs.

started in on this a couple of days ago.

having been sitting in the garage and not been ridden in over 12 months, the camping bike needs a bunch of things done to it.

tires:
had gone flat. probably a bunch of dried sealant inside. pulled the tubeless valve cores out, poured a 2 oz. bottle of Stans in each, then re-seated the beads with a floor pump and let them weep a bit of sealant while sitting overnight. good to roll.

brakes:
hydraulic pistons had seized closed. pulled the wheels back off the bike, pulled the pads out and backed the pistons out with a flathead screwdriver. re-installed the wheels and pumped the brakes to re-center the pistons. good to stop.

handlebars:
never cared much for the stock handlebars, swapped them out for a set of Shimano PRO PLT bars from my parts bin. unwrapped all the dirty bar tape that was still on them from SSCXWCPDX '16. ordered new bar wrap. will finish reinstalling the levers after the tape arrives. will need to reinstall the handlebar bag mount as well.

still to do:
- clean and relube drivetrain. wiped some surface rust off the chain and sprayed it with a bit of silicon spray to loosen it up. a deep-clean will follow later. may pull the crank off and clean up the old grease on the spindle.
- fix front derailleur. cable is stretched and indexing needs adjustment.
- pull camping gear (sleeping pad, water filter, etc.) out from closet and make sure it's clean and aired out.

I want to hear more on this "Low Country Boil", which will of course have vegan sausage instead of the real thing because I and all the other pescatarians hate you all (and we hate fun).

Do I need 1 or 2 handles of whiskey?

Have you considered repacking your hubs and bottom brackets. Might as well do a full Joe and perform a complete disassembly and reassembly.

this year I was going to go full re-tension all brake and shifter lines!

with enough practice you can learn to retension your brake cables while riding. I've gotten to the point where I do it almost every time I need to slow down.