now with 50 percent more EVILJoined: 22 Jul 2005Posts: 10566
The Point 83 Fattypants Subcommittee presents the 4th Annual: 9.11 Never Forget! (how fat you really are) 2010
Thursday September 9th
Westlake Center 7pm. Ride to 9 Million In Unmarked Bills (Fremont).
The 9 Mil is hooking us up again this year with fries and drink specials. Half of the restaurant will be reserved for us. THANK THEM HEAVILY at the venue, and buy a few drinks. No need for burgers this year, we're going straight fries. All fries are free and it's free to participate.
soooo....
So you think you can eat?
Our eating contest consists of as many endless fries as you can eat. baskets of fries will be tallied. Point 83 eat off!
Fry spoke cards, trophy for the winner, and bragging rights as the fattest fatty. To register, show up, ride, check in with me to be a fry eating participant, and eat eat eat.
RULES
1. Vomit: if you vomit, you cannot continue until you re-eat the vomit food. if you refuse to eat your own fry vomit, disqualified. if you do eat your vomit, you are a-ok to continue.
2. Time Limits no time limit! im hesitant to make a time limit, because we are doing this unannounced and cant expect a constrant stream of fries at hand every second (so speed of eating is not important). I'll have a tally system in place to count how many fry baskets everyone has eaten, regardless of how fast they get to the table. if two people are still eating the fries at the table an hour and a half after they first hit the table, let them continue eating until we make up a new rule saying otherwise or until one of them finally bows out.
3. Bathroom breaks NO BATHROOM BREAKS. go before the food hit the table. if you must go to the bathroom, in order to continue without disqualification, pooping and or peeing must be done AT THE TABLE. if you're man (or woman) enough to make more room in front of everyone, then more power to you.
4. Bowing out if you're done, and you can't go any further, you must scream "IM A STUPID BABY". At that time your total will be posted, and you are free to do whatever you'd like with the contents of your stomach. If you vomit outside, you might not be let back in, it's a bar after all.
the person with the most fry baskets eaten will win the GOLDEN POTATO trophy, a few extra pounds (enabling them to enter craigslist personals as a BBM/W), and our constant admiration and limited respect.
MOST BASKETS OF FRIES is the goal here. if you can down 20 baskets of fries in a short time then you bow out. thats ok. length of time is not important. if you eat 20, dont vomit (or eat it if you do), then bow out, it's up to everyone else to beat your limit. amount is the goal here, not time.
Eric_s
Posted: Tue Sep 07, 2010 6:09 pm
Joined: 07 Mar 2007Posts: 1691Location: the dirty south
should this also be posted at bicyclejihad for maximum lulz?
derrickito
Posted: Tue Sep 07, 2010 6:12 pm
now with 50 percent more EVILJoined: 22 Jul 2005Posts: 10566
finally, a use for that damn url
fatasian
Posted: Tue Sep 07, 2010 6:13 pm
dick wang's fatherJoined: 26 Aug 2008Posts: 1707Location: devenshire
Fire up your funholes! Who will be this years champion?
corpusjuris
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 8:50 am
Don't you ever lie to meJoined: 12 May 2008Posts: 1059Location: Boat on a hill
joeball wrote:
Fire up your funholes! Who will be this years champion?
That is still my favorite .83 photo ever. I'm still on the fence if I'll make the actual eating contest, but I will at very least meet back up to laugh at distended stomachs and patriotic vomiting. Has the planning committee planned the after-location? Last year we just FFP'ed it since nobody wanted to ride more than four blocks (justifiably).
_________________ "Are those guys hitting each other? Should someone be doing something about this?" "No, they're just playing this game that they play, and they'll wear themselves out in a minute or two."
the dreaded ben
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 10:03 am
Grumpy GreebJoined: 20 Aug 2005Posts: 5329Location: flavor country
i mean christ, they are already giving us all the frys we can eat, letting us host it there at the last minute, and giving us drink specials on their fancy slog night. the least we could do is pay our full discounted price.
but i'm all for getting one and spending it at a later date.
fatasian
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 10:09 am
dick wang's fatherJoined: 26 Aug 2008Posts: 1707Location: devenshire
you make a good point. use my link!
gsbarnes
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 10:51 am
Joined: 15 Aug 2006Posts: 2666Location: No Fun Town, USA
I demand my free fries be 50% off!
_________________ I have always thought in the back of my mind: Cheese and Onions
mailemae
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 2:49 pm
not very stokedJoined: 03 Sep 2009Posts: 303Location: winterfell
um, has anyone mentioned whether/where re: prefunc?
I'm bringing 1-3 special guests! one or more of whom may be my blood relatives. n00bs begetting n00bs - enjoy.
tehschkott
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 3:15 pm
daywalkerJoined: 09 Nov 2007Posts: 6108Location: Hatertown
Prefunk - 9 Million in UnMarked Bills! SLOG happyhour!
How meta is that
_________________ GREAT UNITER / ORACLE / ELDER
MOOAAR DONGS
corpusjuris
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 3:21 pm
Don't you ever lie to meJoined: 12 May 2008Posts: 1059Location: Boat on a hill
tehschkott wrote:
Prefunk - 9 Million in UnMarked Bills! SLOG happyhour!
How meta is that
I like this idea.
_________________ "Are those guys hitting each other? Should someone be doing something about this?" "No, they're just playing this game that they play, and they'll wear themselves out in a minute or two."
derrickito
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 5:55 pm
now with 50 percent more EVILJoined: 22 Jul 2005Posts: 10566
if anyone can help me out on fry day, im left handed and can't write:
1 person to write down names on the clip board of contestants. go through the crowd and gather up names. as the eating begins, you'll be the person that they give the empties to and tallies up the results. you're the person in charge. any takers? i'll be the loudmouth if needed hollering things out. you keep the paperwork.
fight club quote: you can determine your own level of involvement :)
also, if anyone not eating can help us in the kitchen with the fryers and shuttling fries, that would rock. + side of this job is you can flavor the fries any amount of disgusting ways you can come up with in order to gross out the contestants
lastly, anyone around during the day tomorrow? i need a hand putting the trophies together. i have all the parts, just need a hand with a saw, screw driver, and readying potatoes. ill be around most all day, holler if you cvan help. or ill just go bug scott
SKETCHY
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 6:00 pm
Joined: 25 Aug 2007Posts: 336Location: Everywhere
Yea Derrick, I'll give you a hand, After all, I did help you button your pants once
_________________ Pissing the world off since 1973.
derrickito
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 6:10 pm
now with 50 percent more EVILJoined: 22 Jul 2005Posts: 10566
with which yo?
laura
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 6:45 pm
Joined: 22 Jun 2007Posts: 1050Location: wherever the dance party is
derrickito wrote:
if anyone can help me out on fry day, im left handed and can't write:
also, if anyone not eating can help us in the kitchen with the fryers and shuttling fries, that would rock. + side of this job is you can flavor the fries any amount of disgusting ways you can come up with in order to gross out the contestants
can do!
_________________ alumni
applesauche
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 8:05 pm
Joined: 08 Oct 2006Posts: 337Location: Capitol Hill
this is too gross to miss. i can help with the vomit tally.
the dreaded ben
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 9:18 pm
Grumpy GreebJoined: 20 Aug 2005Posts: 5329Location: flavor country
dear sir or madam,
i have an extensive background in gluttony management, food arts, and the sacrilegious, and am very excited with the opportunity of becoming the next member of your team.
ksep
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 9:19 pm
Joined: 27 Jan 2007Posts: 1879Location: Westlake
derrickito wrote:
also, if anyone not eating can help us in the kitchen with the fryers and shuttling fries, that would rock. + side of this job is you can flavor the fries any amount of disgusting ways you can come up with in order to gross out the contestants
i can help with that.
_________________ -Kevin
derrickito
Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 10:07 pm
now with 50 percent more EVILJoined: 22 Jul 2005Posts: 10566
perfect. ben you're in charge of problems. ill have everything you need for management.
trophies are 90 percent done (thanks scott and ericdabeard)
laura and kevin and others, you're kitchen help! thanks all.
feel free to pile on the americana as much as you can. american flag and red white and blue up the ride. food coloring if you have it, can help color up your vomit
fourfingersdown
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 8:00 am
r.w. = rainn wilson!Joined: 21 Mar 2008Posts: 1078Location: NOT FUCKING ENGLAND
We really just need help running the fries out of the kitchen. I wanna keep as out of the way as possible for their kitchen staff, it's a small kitchen, with only one fryer, so it's kinda a one person operation. This year we'll be in the main room, and have more access to the heat lamps, which will be nice.
_________________ Please disregard.
laura
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:19 am
Joined: 22 Jun 2007Posts: 1050Location: wherever the dance party is
Where is the french fly flash?!?!
_________________ alumni
corpusjuris
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:36 am
Don't you ever lie to meJoined: 12 May 2008Posts: 1059Location: Boat on a hill
Are people still thinking about 9 Mil for a prefunk to "encourage" slog happy? If so, I would love to join that, then stick around and not go back to WLC in order to watch the Sounders stuff (look, I'm devoted, and I can't fucking decide what I'm doing still).
If this happens, I volunteer my mediocre labor to any setup help still necessary.
_________________ "Are those guys hitting each other? Should someone be doing something about this?" "No, they're just playing this game that they play, and they'll wear themselves out in a minute or two."
laura
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:41 am
Joined: 22 Jun 2007Posts: 1050Location: wherever the dance party is
corpusjuris wrote:
then stick around and not go back to WLC
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
_________________ alumni
joby
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:50 am
goes to elevenJoined: 25 Jul 2005Posts: 3899Location: The Cloud
God damn I'm hungry.
This is going to be great.
kristen
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 10:00 am
yeah, sploosh.Joined: 19 Jul 2009Posts: 503Location: the parched hellscape of SF
fourfingersdown wrote:
We really just need help running the fries out of the kitchen. I wanna keep as out of the way as possible for their kitchen staff, it's a small kitchen, with only one fryer, so it's kinda a one person operation. This year we'll be in the main room, and have more access to the heat lamps, which will be nice.
I will be showing up a little bit late (it turns out I'm kind of a big deal at my job, and my presence is required at a work dinner), but I'd be happy to do some fry-running when I get there (hopefully no later than 8:30).
_________________ i like whiskey. consequently, i want six whiskeys.
Lutella
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 10:24 am
Joined: 20 Mar 2007Posts: 206Location: all dressed in yella
How to get a few related thoughts into one economical post:
1) This will be my FIRST fry ride, although I'll be joining it already in progress.
2) Will the bartender make me a potato vodka martini in a ketchup-rimmed glass?
3) Ortlieb products aren't just waterproof, they're also vomit-proof. (Thanks, Germany!)
4) Never forget.
joby
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 10:27 am
goes to elevenJoined: 25 Jul 2005Posts: 3899Location: The Cloud
I'm eating sour cream and onion potato chips right now! Gettin' in the moood.
henry
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 10:34 am
somewhat piggishJoined: 05 Aug 2005Posts: 5415Location: on porch with shotgun
kristen wrote:
it turns out I'm kind of a big deal at my job, and my presence is required at a work dinner)
Oh, is there a meeting of the American Humility Professionals Society tonight?
goes to elevenJoined: 25 Jul 2005Posts: 3899Location: The Cloud
henry wrote:
kristen wrote:
it turns out I'm kind of a big deal at my job, and my presence is required at a work dinner)
Oh, is there a meeting of the American Humility Professionals Society tonight?
Indeed! we can compare option packages!
Kyleen
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 10:54 am
might have vagina, unconfirmedJoined: 06 Jan 2010Posts: 948Location: Space pirate ship manned by dinosaurs
I'll be a fry runner, if you still need peoples. Also for hire as an eating coach. I'm a pro at eating shit, after all.
corpusjuris
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 11:02 am
Don't you ever lie to meJoined: 12 May 2008Posts: 1059Location: Boat on a hill
Kyleen wrote:
I'm a pro at eating shit, after all.
I know more about you every day. I wish that fact would have stopped a long while ago now, since it's getting down to stuff like this.
_________________ "Are those guys hitting each other? Should someone be doing something about this?" "No, they're just playing this game that they play, and they'll wear themselves out in a minute or two."
Kyleen
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 11:05 am
might have vagina, unconfirmedJoined: 06 Jan 2010Posts: 948Location: Space pirate ship manned by dinosaurs
I take out a pile of people every time too. I should make some sign up sheets. You in?
SKETCHY
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 11:07 am
Joined: 25 Aug 2007Posts: 336Location: Everywhere
kyleen, I eat shit too. watch my profile photo, wait, wait wait. ha
_________________ Pissing the world off since 1973.
joeball
Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 11:17 am
Joined: 24 Jul 2005Posts: 6037Location: Ether
SKETCHY wrote:
kyleen, I eat shit too. watch my profile photo, wait, wait wait. ha
SKETCHY made a comprehensive post that was kind of funny?
*starts slow clap*
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